Yes, we are preparing for our transpacific trip to oz--but i had to rant about the illinois campus police chief's press release regarding the college shooting by kazmierczak. He states, "Apparently he had been taking medication but stopped and became somewhat erratic." Subsequent media reports will go on to say he was off an "unnamed" medication.
Um. Was he on claritin? Antibiotics? No, no. We all know he was on some sort of medication for a mental illness. But is it generally known that he was probably on an antipsychotic? A medication for schizophrenia or bipolar disorder? We're not talking prozac or wellbutrin. I believe this contributes to the false beliefs many people have about medications used for depression and anxiety. Some people i see in clinic are reluctant to take medication for their anxiety/depression because, by god, they don't feel like they want to shoot up a school or anything. They aren't *that* crazy. All they have is a sleep issue. If i'd just prescribe some sleep aids for them, they'd be just fine! insert sarcasm.
Monday, February 18, 2008
Friday, February 15, 2008
What Crazy People Do
The good news is the baby has stopped screaming so much. The bad news? She doesn't like to sleep very long. I should rephrase: She doesn't like to sleep long for me. My husband had no problems putting her down in her crib last night and she slept a solid 2 hours---which is a lot!
She enjoys being held and being rocked side to side. She especially likes her head to bob a little as if she is casually shaking her head "no." Two nights ago, it was 4am and i couldn't get her to sleep, so i gently rocked her and allowed her to shake her head, which lulled her to sleep. As i watched her drift off, i was curious why this motion was so soothing to her. So i slowly lulled my head back and forth. Then it occured to me: This is what crazy people do. They shake their head to see what it feels like.
She had her 2 month visit and weighed in at a whopping 13 pounds 4 oz. That means she has gained almost a pound per week since she was born. No wonder she's so unsettled...It takes a lot of energy to grow so fast!
And now we prepare for the LissyJo family trip to australia. Can 2 adults carry 2 car seats, 2 strollers, 2 large backpacks, a diaper bag, and the toddler's bag? OH and 2 small children? Doubtful. How exasperated do us adults have to look and how cute do the gils have to look to get a helping hand? Stay tuned....i'll be sure to let you know.
She enjoys being held and being rocked side to side. She especially likes her head to bob a little as if she is casually shaking her head "no." Two nights ago, it was 4am and i couldn't get her to sleep, so i gently rocked her and allowed her to shake her head, which lulled her to sleep. As i watched her drift off, i was curious why this motion was so soothing to her. So i slowly lulled my head back and forth. Then it occured to me: This is what crazy people do. They shake their head to see what it feels like.
She had her 2 month visit and weighed in at a whopping 13 pounds 4 oz. That means she has gained almost a pound per week since she was born. No wonder she's so unsettled...It takes a lot of energy to grow so fast!
And now we prepare for the LissyJo family trip to australia. Can 2 adults carry 2 car seats, 2 strollers, 2 large backpacks, a diaper bag, and the toddler's bag? OH and 2 small children? Doubtful. How exasperated do us adults have to look and how cute do the gils have to look to get a helping hand? Stay tuned....i'll be sure to let you know.
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Yes We Can
I was happily surprised to hear obama won in mn, even though "they" couldn't hear my argument because i was working. After hearing about this video on youtube on npr, i watched it with my daughter watching. She asked who 'that man' was. I told her it was obama--our next president and as i tried to explain why he keeps saying 'yes we can,' i became teary thinking of how much our country needs change (don't laugh..i blame hormones). It seems obama's talent is raising hope in our exasperated country and i hope that when he is elected, our country doesn't turn on him when he can't immediately change the massive f*ck up bush has created.
Monday, February 4, 2008
Adoption Shmadoption
Um, has anyone seen Adoption Stories on TLC? I just watched one where a canadian couple adopts a child from haiti. To give you an idea, the orphanage is called "god's little angels." They could have called the episode "White Couple Saves Black Baby From Terrible Country." They make a big deal about the adoptive mother feeding the baby his "first meal," (nevermind he looks about one year old and has probably eaten prior to her arrival) and how to care for his "terribly" dry hair and skin (by "terrible," did she mean 'black' or 'orphaned?'). They also had a small blurp about meeting the birthmother where they got the comforting story that she wanted to do the best she could for her child, which meant "giving him up" to this lovely canadian couple. They laughed about how they couldn't possibly keep his name, Wendi, unless he was guarenteed to grow up to be a football player--so his name was changed to something like adrian.
Watching this episode was like watching a car accident. It mostly made me sad about the show overlooking the complete adoption story, which might not be as sweet and tidy as portrayed. I was especially curious about the access to the birthmother. It seemed the adoptive parents were recieving most of their direction about baby cares from the orphanage manager instead of the birth mother. Does the agency keep them separated? Is it usual for the adoptive parents to meet the birth mother? What exactly are the circumstances surrounding this adoption and her "choice" to adopt out?
Speaking of sad adoption stories, did you see the story in the strib about the korean adoptee who found her birth family which included a twin sister? Her birthmother is terminally ill and drops the bomb on her daughter that she has a twin that she 'gave up' for adoption at birth and she'd like her to find her. And here that daughter is living in rural, minnesota. Damn.
Watching this episode was like watching a car accident. It mostly made me sad about the show overlooking the complete adoption story, which might not be as sweet and tidy as portrayed. I was especially curious about the access to the birthmother. It seemed the adoptive parents were recieving most of their direction about baby cares from the orphanage manager instead of the birth mother. Does the agency keep them separated? Is it usual for the adoptive parents to meet the birth mother? What exactly are the circumstances surrounding this adoption and her "choice" to adopt out?
Speaking of sad adoption stories, did you see the story in the strib about the korean adoptee who found her birth family which included a twin sister? Her birthmother is terminally ill and drops the bomb on her daughter that she has a twin that she 'gave up' for adoption at birth and she'd like her to find her. And here that daughter is living in rural, minnesota. Damn.
I Love Work!
When the baby was 6 weeks old, she was fussy. The day before i was to do my first urgent care shift, she cried her head off for what seemed like hours. My husband is usually cool, calm and collected when dealing with screaming children, but the night before i was to go to work, he turned to me and said, "It's going to be a f*cking disaster." At this point, i was truly looking forward to working again and so i replied, "You'll figure it out." And indeed he did.
Since then, i have picked up a handful of shifts and it's been good for us all. My husband has become quite saavy with both children. I have seen some interesting cases at urgent care. And i think i'm an easier person to be around. Additionally, i feel like i enjoy my family more. I am reminded of what a delicate balance it is to be away from your family just enough to enjoy them. I certainly wouldn't want to work full time--and i'm still a bit nervous about throwing the baby in daycare at 3 months, but working part-time is good for me, for my brain, for my children and for the family.
Since then, i have picked up a handful of shifts and it's been good for us all. My husband has become quite saavy with both children. I have seen some interesting cases at urgent care. And i think i'm an easier person to be around. Additionally, i feel like i enjoy my family more. I am reminded of what a delicate balance it is to be away from your family just enough to enjoy them. I certainly wouldn't want to work full time--and i'm still a bit nervous about throwing the baby in daycare at 3 months, but working part-time is good for me, for my brain, for my children and for the family.
Toddler --> Preschooler
Indeed--The toddler is now a preschooler. She created her own guest list and although 3 families and her aunty couldn't come due to puking disease ("That's ok...you can keep those germs far far away."), there were plenty of people to create semi-child chaos. With all the chocolate and sugar and cake flying around the room, i reflected on her first bday when she hadn't had much processed sugar and definately hadn't had candy or chocolate. I had baked an all-fruit, sugar-free cake not only for the baby, but for guests. When i cleaned up the bowls from her 1st bday party, they all contained a full piece of cake with one small bit out of the corner.
This year, we got the cake from lunds and it was 3/4 frosting, 1/4 cake. My daughter didn't have much cake, but she loved the chocolate from the pinata. She has been enjoying the presents--although the biggest one from my parents is in storage. Don't get upset gma and gpa--it's snowing outside and even the italians don't ride their vespas out in the snow.
Speaking of the pinata...I bought an authentic mexican pinata on lake street, but didn't realize how difficult it would be to get into. After the children pushed it around with a baseball bat for a while, my husband took the pinata behind closed doors and we heard the sounds of a saw. It came back with a small laceration on it's abdomen. A few more half-hearted pats with the bat and away it went with my husband and more sawing. After the 3rd time the pinata returned with his whole lower half hanging on a strand for the last child to knock down.
Before:And after:
Friday, February 1, 2008
The Caucus Is Coming!
I'm sad that Edwards pulled out. According to mpr's website, he was my guy. I also really enjoyed listening to him speak. There is little difference between the remaining two candidates, as far as i can tell. And although race and gender are important things to me--it isn't as important as the media makes it out to be. It will be great to be alive for the first black president or the first woman president, but i believe i was raised to look beyond that. Race and gender definately contribute to character, but can i tell you how sick i am of being asked, "Is america ready for a black/woman president?"
I have a friend who suggests this difference of view is due to age: babyboomers versus gen x (or y). The baby boomers spent their young adult years fighting against gender and race disparities and i thank them for fighting for equal rights and respect the strides they made. I am sure it is amazing to see how things have changed in their lifetime in regards to equality. But what they fought for is for me to look beyond color and gender when voting for the next president. The babyboomer news analysts and experts need to stop stuffing it down my throat. Yes i noticed she's a woman, but what does she think about the war? Yes, he is indeed black, but how will he fix health care?
Some are getting sick of the ramp up to the next election with the prolonged process of earlier primaries/caucuses, but i have to admit i am excited about it all. I think it has caused people who otherwise wouldn't be tuned in pay attention. I had become exhausted with mindless people who care more about their trip to walmart than current events--but i think the media's slutting of the primaries has caused people to tune in and be involved.
I have a friend who suggests this difference of view is due to age: babyboomers versus gen x (or y). The baby boomers spent their young adult years fighting against gender and race disparities and i thank them for fighting for equal rights and respect the strides they made. I am sure it is amazing to see how things have changed in their lifetime in regards to equality. But what they fought for is for me to look beyond color and gender when voting for the next president. The babyboomer news analysts and experts need to stop stuffing it down my throat. Yes i noticed she's a woman, but what does she think about the war? Yes, he is indeed black, but how will he fix health care?
Some are getting sick of the ramp up to the next election with the prolonged process of earlier primaries/caucuses, but i have to admit i am excited about it all. I think it has caused people who otherwise wouldn't be tuned in pay attention. I had become exhausted with mindless people who care more about their trip to walmart than current events--but i think the media's slutting of the primaries has caused people to tune in and be involved.
Friday, January 25, 2008
More Observations
Occasionally, i catch glimpse of my life right now. I am consumed with being a mom right now. I do an ECFE class with the toddler, a mom and baby class with the newborn, we go to kid-friendly coffee shops and attend fun child-centered activities around the city (like the "childish films" at central library last weekend...we saw a movie about "the village of east germany" circa 1980).
Although this is the case right now, I am aware of the world around me. I am amused that jon stewart is able to carry his show without writers (still very funny...what does that say about the contributions the writers were giving?). I am researching what exactly it means to caucus and why some states have caucuses versus primary elections. I have become more exasperated by the actions of sports heroes--especially since the majority of role models for children, intended or not, are off the wagon or retarded.
And tonight i return to work--only a 4 hour shift. I have moved from being worried about what the baby will do with out me to what my husband will do with a crying baby to finally being excited about utilizing different parts of my brain and get back into work.
Although this is the case right now, I am aware of the world around me. I am amused that jon stewart is able to carry his show without writers (still very funny...what does that say about the contributions the writers were giving?). I am researching what exactly it means to caucus and why some states have caucuses versus primary elections. I have become more exasperated by the actions of sports heroes--especially since the majority of role models for children, intended or not, are off the wagon or retarded.
And tonight i return to work--only a 4 hour shift. I have moved from being worried about what the baby will do with out me to what my husband will do with a crying baby to finally being excited about utilizing different parts of my brain and get back into work.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Save Some For Me
This morning, as i cuddled in bed with my two daughters reading books, i started to breastfeed the baby. As the toddler started to protest because breastfeeding was interfering with the book, I explained that i used to breastfeed her when she was a baby. My toddler responded, "Yeah, and i didn't drink it all from your nipple because i left some for my baby sister to drink."
Monday, January 21, 2008
Family of Four
Things are getting easier as a family of four. The baby is 6 weeks and i'm hoping she read all the books that i did that said 6 weeks is the peak of fussiness. "Fussiness" is not descriptive enough. "Fussy" makes it sound like she's particular and maybe a little eccentric. Instead, she gets f*cking pissed. She screams her head off when she's mad and she's mad when she's not in a sling or being held by me. And even when she is being held by me, she'll sometimes just scream to remind me that i'm not the boss of her. Of course, when we are in the company of others, she is quiet and calm and sleeping (as some fellow bloggers saw at korean dinner last week....i'm telling you guys!). I'm probably being dramatic--I keep reminding myself that thank god she doesn't have colic and she's healthy and growing. But mothers of newborns have license to be dramatic. It's hormonal, i'm sure.
She has been smiling and growing growing growing. I have already packed away her 0-3 month clothes and slowly exchanging out all the 3-6 month clothes. We're on to 6-9 month, folks. Because it was summer time when my toddler was 6-9 months old, and her sizes matched perfectly for hand-me-downs from her cousin, for the first time ever, we're getting a little slim of clothes. Once upon a child, here i come.
I have been riding on the bicycle on a trainer in the porch almost every evening when my husband comes home. The first time i did this, i watched through the big picture window as my husband rounded the corner with the baby screaming in the baby bjorn and a bottle in hand with my toddler running circles around him. Since then, he has become more confident (and efficient) with both and i am starting to feel like i'm getting healthy again.
Although i'm not going back to my clinic for another 6 weeks, i am picking up urgent care shifts starting this friday. They are fairly easy shifts to pick up--only 4 hours and in the evenings or weekends. I am looking forward to getting my head back into work and am only a little anxious about it. I'm more anxious about what my husband will do when the baby finds out he has no breasts and he is not....me.
We are also planning our trip to australia next month. Because my breasts will be coming with us, i'm not too worried about the baby. I do wonder how the toddler will do. I'm comforted by the fact that she has done lots of travel and that my husband is good at "dealing" with her.
But enough about my breasts....
She has been smiling and growing growing growing. I have already packed away her 0-3 month clothes and slowly exchanging out all the 3-6 month clothes. We're on to 6-9 month, folks. Because it was summer time when my toddler was 6-9 months old, and her sizes matched perfectly for hand-me-downs from her cousin, for the first time ever, we're getting a little slim of clothes. Once upon a child, here i come.
I have been riding on the bicycle on a trainer in the porch almost every evening when my husband comes home. The first time i did this, i watched through the big picture window as my husband rounded the corner with the baby screaming in the baby bjorn and a bottle in hand with my toddler running circles around him. Since then, he has become more confident (and efficient) with both and i am starting to feel like i'm getting healthy again.
Although i'm not going back to my clinic for another 6 weeks, i am picking up urgent care shifts starting this friday. They are fairly easy shifts to pick up--only 4 hours and in the evenings or weekends. I am looking forward to getting my head back into work and am only a little anxious about it. I'm more anxious about what my husband will do when the baby finds out he has no breasts and he is not....me.
We are also planning our trip to australia next month. Because my breasts will be coming with us, i'm not too worried about the baby. I do wonder how the toddler will do. I'm comforted by the fact that she has done lots of travel and that my husband is good at "dealing" with her.
But enough about my breasts....
Monday, January 14, 2008
LissyJo Clan Look-alike Meter
Most people look at our children and coo over how much they look like me. I always chalked this up to the fact that i live around people who are used to seeing white people and they see the little bit of asian in our girls and automatically think they look like me. I see our girls and see my husband--especially seeing pictures of my husband's sister's kids. This highly scientific website proves that our children look like either the perfect mix of both of us or nothing like either of us. Because the look-alike meter kicks out a similar number for the likliness of me and my parents (ah hem..i'm adopted), i believe the later.
Friday, January 11, 2008
My Giant Baby
Who said breastfed babies aren't as big as formula-fed babies? My ravenous child gained 3 pounds in just shy of 3 weeks. At 4 weeks, she is a whopping 11 pounds 4 oz! The babe has been sleeping longer stretches (2, sometimes 3 hours) and has given some "real" smiles. She decided to smile early because she knows i come close to giving my toddler full parental rights when she screams every evening and challenges my patience.
Speaking of patience (or lack thereof), who knew toddler whining, which is a relatively benign sound, could make me want to tear my eyes out with sharp knives?
Speaking of patience (or lack thereof), who knew toddler whining, which is a relatively benign sound, could make me want to tear my eyes out with sharp knives?
Monday, January 7, 2008
Baby
The LissyJo family went to our favorite dim sum at JunBo on sunday. After nursing the baby, i put her in my sling for a walk to menards when she spit up her whole lunch. It actually made a little puddle between her and me inside the sling. It was a special moment.
Not sure where my mental filter was when i told one of my friends with a 7 month old that i really loved getting my nose in my baby's neck folds and inhaling deeply. The more randy her neck with old milk and dead skin cells, the better. She gave me the face you probably have right now and said, "Um. You're a real primal mom, aren't you."
I went to the bathroom and left the baby on the floor while the toddler was reading by herself. I heard the baby yelp out and as i finished up, i heard the toddler say, "It's ok, how's your hair?" As i walked in, the toddler jumped around attempting to hide a baby comb behind her back with an oh shit look on her face. The thought crossed my head that this is the beginning of a lifetime of oh shit looks and secrets between sisters.
I went to the first class of a mom and baby group today. I was the mother of the youngest baby there, and the only mother with an older child. I am ashamed to say it was a confidence builder. I watched the other moms struggle with getting their baby to breastfeed discretely (before i told them to not worry about it), or tentatively change a diaper or struggle with the 20 pound diaper bag they brought with them and voice concerns that they worried their baby wasn't getting enough as they leaked straight through their shirt. I felt like an expert as i breezed right in and confidently breastfed and burped my baby, and gave advice on baby slings. It made me realize that i have learned something about mothering babies and i do know it will get better even though i am just as sleep deprived as they are.
Not sure where my mental filter was when i told one of my friends with a 7 month old that i really loved getting my nose in my baby's neck folds and inhaling deeply. The more randy her neck with old milk and dead skin cells, the better. She gave me the face you probably have right now and said, "Um. You're a real primal mom, aren't you."
I went to the bathroom and left the baby on the floor while the toddler was reading by herself. I heard the baby yelp out and as i finished up, i heard the toddler say, "It's ok, how's your hair?" As i walked in, the toddler jumped around attempting to hide a baby comb behind her back with an oh shit look on her face. The thought crossed my head that this is the beginning of a lifetime of oh shit looks and secrets between sisters.
I went to the first class of a mom and baby group today. I was the mother of the youngest baby there, and the only mother with an older child. I am ashamed to say it was a confidence builder. I watched the other moms struggle with getting their baby to breastfeed discretely (before i told them to not worry about it), or tentatively change a diaper or struggle with the 20 pound diaper bag they brought with them and voice concerns that they worried their baby wasn't getting enough as they leaked straight through their shirt. I felt like an expert as i breezed right in and confidently breastfed and burped my baby, and gave advice on baby slings. It made me realize that i have learned something about mothering babies and i do know it will get better even though i am just as sleep deprived as they are.
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